Dating Rules For Success

1.      Do not pretend to be someone other than who you are.  If you don’t like heights, don’t agree to go bungee jumping just because you told your date that you won an award for bungee jumping.  Pretending can get you into all sorts of trouble.

2.      Do not pretend to like something that you do not like.  If you don’t like brussel sprouts, don’t pretend as you could spend the rest of your life trying to feed them to your dog or hiding them in nearby house plants.

3.      Do not complain about your current or past dates or your life. Nobody likes a whiner.

4.      Do not talk badly about other people.  If you do talk badly about others, your date that you like so much, may be wondering what you will say about him/her and there may not be a second date.

5.      Be kind.  Kindness is under rated and people of all backgrounds respond positively to kindness.

6.      Be interested.  Everyone has a story.  Really.  Any story can be interesting if you listen.  And if it is not interesting, than share your interesting stories.  At least you will get practice talking about yourself.  When their eyes glaze over, it is probably time to move on to another topic.

7.      Be patient, as your date may be nervous.  Nervousness is cute and tells you that the date is important to the other person.

8.      If asked what you would like to do, make a couple of suggestions.  Have a couple of ideas for later in the date that don’t involve a lot of money.  That shows consideration on your part.

9.      Ladies, eat something.  Everyone knows that females do eat. Guys, don’t comment on what she is eating.  This is self-explanatory and if you don’t get it you may not deserve a second date.

10.  Thank your date for the date and let them know if you are interested in seeing them again.   If you don’t drop a hint, like “I look forward to seeing you again” or “It is ok for you to call me again”, your date may not realize you enjoyed yourself.

11.  Do not have unrealistic expectations of this date.  It is just a date.  For those of you with some co-dependency issues, a date is just a date and not a lifelong commitment.

12.  Follow your instincts about another date.  If your instincts say yes, go out again.  If your instincts say no, do not go out again.  It is important to trust yourself.

13.  Ask questions, don’t just talk about yourself.  If you monopolize the conversation, you may come across as boring and narcissistic and you miss the opportunity to get to know more about the other person. 

14.  Be on time.  This is a pet peeve for many people and can kill a second date.

15.  Be courteous.  Old fashioned though it may be, “thank you” and “excuse me” still go a long way in impressing other people that you have some social consideration.

16.  It is reasonable to date multiple people, but don’t discuss other dates with your current date and once monogamous, outside dating is discouraged.  This is self-explanatory.

17.  Expect the man to pay, but offer to contribute.  If he takes your money, he may not merit a second date.  This is an individual decision, but I think the guy should show you that he is really interested and also generous. 

18.  Let the man make the initial date.  Hints are fine. “We should get together some time” is a good old standby.

19.  Don’t have sex on the first date.  You don’t really know who you are with yet and what are you telling the other person?  You are telling them that you don’t really respect yourself.

20.  If you have children, don’t keep it a secret.  Children are part of a package and some people are just not interested in a package.  

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